asgardgenesis | ᴏᴏ1 ( ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ/ᴛᴇxᴛ ) | ʙᴇʜᴏʟᴅ ᴍʏ ɢᴇɴɪᴜs.

[ good morning, asgard. you are greeted to a singular video, which shows a rather chaotic room in the odin housing unit. it has a desk shoved in the corner, covered in a bunch of spare parts of some cannibalized technology strewn all over the place. but in another corner of the room appears to be something that looks a bit like cooler with a solar panel on it.

tethered to it is a little roomba that has a blinking light, and seems to be attempting to vacuum the place, but is continually yanked backwards by the confines of its charge cord.

and then, once the video shows what it seems to show, a text is also sent out to the entire network, simply stating: ]

READ THIS BEFORE YOU ASK ME SOMETHING INCREDIBLY STUPID:

(1) It's a solar powered generator. It generates something called electricity, which can power things we call machines. It can hold a pretty hefty charge, but it isn't very powerful. I can maybe reboot a battery, and that's about it, until I expand my operation.

(2) No, you cannot have one.

(3) No, I am not building you one.

(4) I'll let you charge your cell phones if, and only if, you bring me any useful garbage you collected when it fell from the sky a few weeks ago.

(5) I don't do delivery.

(6) Don't show up at my door asking to use it. There's a sign-up sheet in the front hall of the library. Go put your name on it and sign up for a time slot.

(7) Seriously, if you show up at my door without an invite, I am revoking your cell phone privileges, and I will use your outdated trash heap you call a smart phone for parts.

(8) You're welcome.

[ what a charmer. ]

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[ the explanation... strikes him as both odd, and makes perfect sense. steve has never been one to allow anyone to tell him what to do, and his response to something as simple as going to church every sunday makes... sense.

in a bizarre way. but it makes sense. ]

I never went to church either.

[ and tony just leaves it at that. ]

But I can't really imagine anyone putting my face on a poster at any church. Satanism, maybe.

Something like that.

[ without going into too much detail. it's hard to explain, the creation of elements. and as he fiddles with the wires a bit more: ]

It's possible, but it'll require a lot of legwork. And cooperation, from the people in charge. Whether or not they'd be up to it is still TBD.

Do you trust them to help, or tell the truth?

[ it's not said argumentatively; tony is legitimately asking steve's opinion. ]

The only conversation I've had with Odin didn't exactly end great.

Why can't I have access to your page?
You have access to mine.

There is no one worse.

[ not to tony, anyway. ]

Those are my terms. Otherwise, you get on the sign-up sheet.

Sure thing, boss.

How about I drop by in a few days?
I'm booked for next seventy-two hours or so.

[ truthfully, tony needs to sleep. ]

[ it's a good idea, to make it less creepy, but not quite as functional... still. ]

I'll keep that in mind.

[ he'll figure it out. ]

And I can't think of anything off the top of my head, but if I do, I'll let you know.

because you'll read all the dumb shit my past life did and it's not relevant
i'm not risking getting into a fight with my ver of iron man thx if i don't have another to hold him off

[ His Stark is ... well, Loki seeks no quarrel there, suffice to say. ]

thanos got knocked out cold by cap marvel last i heard of him
no one's ever punched victor von doom and lived to tell about it, just sayin :/
maybe stock up on info that will be useful in ur future if vic or any other supervillain comes callin, it's the smart thing to do
i mean ... like, whatever yeah have the thanos file but i'm being extremely helpful here
enough to not have to sign any lists

[ if tony keeps creating carve-out excuses for people he likes, the sign up sheet will prove to be a useless endeavor. still, he can't help but be amused by the simple curiosity. ]

Sure.

[ with only mild exasperation. ]

I'm free now if you are.

Sort... of.

I'll take it, I guess, is my point.
At the worst, I can fix it so it works and give it to one of the kids.

Depends on the god.
Mine probably wouldn't go for it.

Who'd you go with?
Maybe they support pure baseless fun.

Sure thing.

[ what a mess. ]

At minimum, it'll probably charge wirelessly. Then you can access the basic functions -- camera, video. Basic games. But no network.

Mmmmmm, weapons. Not sure about that. I'll consider it, but I checked out of that game a long time ago.

[ making weapons, that is, for strangers. still: ]

But I might be able to improve your bow and arrow game. Maybe. If you're nice.

Yeah, not big on causing you pain.
It's connected to your nervous system? Totally integrated?

[ . . . aha. ]

Is the watch important to you?
Or is it just a watch?

I can fix it either way, probably. But I'm just curious.
I don't want to break your great-great-grandfather's war memorabilia or whatever tinkering with something I don't understand.

[ . . . fascinating. ]

I'll loot any spaceship you drop at my doorstep, kid.
Doesn't matter to me what it looks like or what it's made out of. I'll figure it out.

And what do you want in return?
Charging a phone? Communicator? Roomba?

[ so captain marvel had thwarted thanos, in that world... and, to be fair, she had done the same in his. they would have lost, no questions asked, without her on their side. still... ]

I want the Thanos file for me.
It's personal.

We can discuss the other details later.
You're offering enough to at least charge your phone, once, without appointment.
I'll see about the rest.

deal
fair warning the page is long af

As long as it's not self-authored, I could care less how long it is.
It's not like we have anything to do here other than hang out and wait for the inevitable, whatever that may be.

Anyway.

I can charge your phone.
Thanks for the info.

asgard's young, anything could happen :)
invasions, more attacks ...

thx

Let's not count our chickens before they hatch, alright.
We've had enough collective excitement to last fifteen lifetimes.
Minimum.

[ The reasonable response would be an immediate, 'no,' but Naminé hesitates to send it. Instead she explains it to him as she explains it to herself; ]

Not exactly.
It's not something that belonged to me before.
I only found it the other day when all of that stuff was falling from the sky.

[ Like most of the objects being offered up here, probably. ]

But

[ Because there is a 'but', isn't there? ]

I really wanted to see it working.
I've never had very many things that belonged to me
just pencils and paper.
Definitely not any pretty ones, or anything that did very much.
And it reminded me of one of the worlds I know of
so I thought it would be nice to be able to keep it.

Besides
I don't like it when something's broken.

[ That's not too strange, is it? To want to help, even if the thing you're helping isn't a person? But maybe that comes from having spent so long not being treated like a person, herself. ]

If you can fix it instead I'd be grateful
but I'm not sure what else I could give you.

[ -- Oh. Belatedly, ]

And I don't have a great-great-grandfather, so you don't have to worry about that.

[Ivar visibly brightens up at the thought of his bow somehow being improved. He looks almost like a regular happy teen, albeit one with a warped interest in ancient weapons.]

If you could do that, I will actually try to be civil when we talk.

[And for Ivar, that's a really big effort.]

It doesn't seem to be doing much of anything to me.

[ Unless you count powering the poor leashed roomba, which Theon obviously does not. ]

I've seen no reason to show it to you. My name is Theon Greyjoy.

when you can
as long as you knock first
i might need a minute to put on my human face
you know
the usual

oh boy, you've never lived in asgard before. i knew it, but now i really know it.

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ᴏᴏ1 ( ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ/ᴛᴇxᴛ ) | ʙᴇʜᴏʟᴅ ᴍʏ ɢᴇɴɪᴜs.

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