ᴏᴏ1 ( ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ/ᴛᴇxᴛ ) | ʙᴇʜᴏʟᴅ ᴍʏ ɢᴇɴɪᴜs.

[privatizes]

[ good morning, asgard. you are greeted to a singular video, which shows a rather chaotic room in the odin housing unit. it has a desk shoved in the corner, covered in a bunch of spare parts of some cannibalized technology strewn all over the place. but in another corner of the room appears to be something that looks a bit like cooler with a solar panel on it.

tethered to it is a little roomba that has a blinking light, and seems to be attempting to vacuum the place, but is continually yanked backwards by the confines of its charge cord.

and then, once the video shows what it seems to show, a text is also sent out to the entire network, simply stating: ]

READ THIS BEFORE YOU ASK ME SOMETHING INCREDIBLY STUPID:

(1) It's a solar powered generator. It generates something called electricity, which can power things we call machines. It can hold a pretty hefty charge, but it isn't very powerful. I can maybe reboot a battery, and that's about it, until I expand my operation.

(2) No, you cannot have one.

(3) No, I am not building you one.

(4) I'll let you charge your cell phones if, and only if, you bring me any useful garbage you collected when it fell from the sky a few weeks ago.

(5) I don't do delivery.

(6) Don't show up at my door asking to use it. There's a sign-up sheet in the front hall of the library. Go put your name on it and sign up for a time slot.

(7) Seriously, if you show up at my door without an invite, I am revoking your cell phone privileges, and I will use your outdated trash heap you call a smart phone for parts.

(8) You're welcome.

[ what a charmer. ]

Comments

[captain_america]

I haven’t actually gone to church since ma died.

[ except for Peggy’s funeral but don’t make him talk about that. ]

I was never very good at sitting there listening to a priest tell me why I was going to hell. Never really thought it was for them to decide. Our actions decide that, if that’s even a thing, and I don’t need to be in a building to talk to god. If I wanted to.

[ Steve makes a face at that. ]

Oh god. I really hope they don’t.

[ especially because he probably doesn’t support what they are spouting. ]

[privatizes]

[ the explanation... strikes him as both odd, and makes perfect sense. steve has never been one to allow anyone to tell him what to do, and his response to something as simple as going to church every sunday makes... sense.

in a bizarre way. but it makes sense. ]

I never went to church either.

[ and tony just leaves it at that. ]

But I can't really imagine anyone putting my face on a poster at any church. Satanism, maybe.