Video; Tell me a story, spin me a rhyme...

[ragnarsson]

[Ivar's in the stables for this broadcast, petting the horse that he usually chooses as his mount. There's a reason he's chosen this particular location as will soon become evident.]

I was told by someone I should tell you stories from my home in an attempt to help this place make more sense. So I shall tell you one, but I warn you I am a warrior first and foremost, so you must forgive me if the tale comes out poorly. I'm sure some of you have been wondering why the horses like Garpr here have eight legs. There is a reason for that in the story they tell back home.

Very long ago, Asgard needed to build a wall to defend itself against things like the giants that roamed the other realms. But how to do it? A builder came to them and offered to do the work within three seasons, asking for the sun, the moon, and the goddess Freyja in exchange. Never ones to turn down a bargain, the Aesir said he could do it, but that he had to complete the work in three seasons. He could have no help save that of his stallion Svaðilfari, a wonderous steed who could pull the mighty stones fast enough that the work would be done just before the deadline was due.

Blaming the trickster god Loki for convincing the gods to allow the horse to help with the work, they told him to solve the problem, lest a terrible punishment be wreaked upon him. The clever god knew of one way to get the work to stop.

Loki transformed himself into a mare and, ah, Svaðilfari realized what kind of a horse she was. He went crazy and tore apart his tackle to pursue her, with his owner chasing after him. The stallion was distracted and went into going into the woods with the disguised god long enough to allow the deadline to pass. [Hey, there's some kids in Asgard, so he's not about to spell everything out. He doesn't want someone yelling at him in case someone like Alice is listening in.]

The builder had to finish the work, but when the Aesir discovered he was a frost giant in disguise, the god Thor was called upon to smash his skull into a thousand pieces rather then give him any payment. [Because it ain't a Norse tale unless some bloodshed is involved.] Loki, still in the form of a mare, later gave birth to a grey foal with eight legs named Sleipnir, who is called the best horse among both mortals and gods. He is Odin's mount, and judging by the horses here, apparently has been prolific in making sure his bloodline continues on. So there you have it, a tale of how a normally male god can be the mother of a horse.

[Look, Norse stories are really weird sometimes, so you all will just have to go with this. They'll only get weirder from here on out.]

Comments

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[prodigalmess]

[ There's a man with bright blue eyes looking at Ivar. ]

That's interesting. I've never heard that story. Then again, I'm not as well-versed in Norse mythology as I am in Greek mythology. So Loki gave birth to a horse. [ That's... weird, but hey. Welcome to mythology. Athena was born out of Zeus's head. ]

I'm actually reading this biography of Ragnar Lothbrok that I found in Odin's library. Surprisingly compelling.

[ragnarsson]

[Goodness, but those are some very blue eyes. And Ivar, given the icy color of his own, knows blue eyes when he sees them. He does feel the need to gently correct Malcolm on one point]

They are not myths. Myths implies they are not real, and considering I am petting an eight-legged horse right now, that speaks to at least some of it being true. We refer to them as stories and legends back home.

[At least he's not about to get all huffy and furious like he used to. Spending time debating theology with the Christian priest he'd kept as a pet/slave had mellowed him out some.

A pleased smile comes over his face at the mention of the biography he'd taken the time to write out. He hadn't been sure anyone would even want to read it.]

Oh? What did you think of it thus far?

[prodigalmess]

To be fair, I'm still not entirely sure this is reality, eight-legged horses aside.

[ He's fairly decided that this isn't a dream, though he's still not quite sure if it's reality. Explaining that rationale might be difficult, but he'll try if Ivar asks. ]

Interesting. It's not a legend that I've ever read before. [ Malcolm pauses as he realizes something. ] You wrote it, didn't you?

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[trafficreport]

[Well, this isn't what Jet was looking for when set about scrounging up information on the place, specifically its transportation. And yet.]

place is like your home?

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[ragnarsson]

Not exactly. These are the gods my people worship back in our own world and we always believed they resided in a different realm then we did as they do here in Asgard. So in a way everything I was told about them was right.

[trafficreport]

in a way.
not literally?

video;

[baisunas]

[ Although he is no scholar of Norse mythology, Hannibal is familiar with some of the stories. ]

Does that mean that all of the stories of this place are true?

[ragnarsson]

Who can say? Maybe most of them are. Maybe very few are. Even the details back home change from storyteller to storyteller.

[baisunas]

I confess myself not wholly familiar with the tales of the Norsemen. I was unaware that there were so many variations.

How is it that you are finding this place? Does it meet your expectations or has it surprised you?

[vagabone]

[It's only weird if you imagine it might be true... and he wishes he weren't. But here he is, in Asgard itself, he can't help it.]

Suppose it's no stranger than someone, uh... someone's father being a lump of feathers, when you think about it.

[Yeah, gods and goddesses are just Like That everywhere, it seems.]

[ragnarsson]

A lump of feathers? I would say that would be ridiculous if the world hadn't been made from the body of the first dead giant.

[Yup, the stories will continue to get stranger and stranger the longer Ivar describes them.]

And if I wasn't talking with a skeleton.

[vagabone]

Feathers. Not the whole bird, just some feathers. [Who even knows. Probably some details were left out over the centuries.

Moving on!] Oh, believe me, it's strange for me too. You know I screamed the first time I saw a living face again? All weird and fleshy?

[Video]

[madcuriosity]

[You are a very VERY wise king, Ivar, because someone EXACTLY like Alice, in that, it IS Alice is listening to him.]

What an absolutely interesting story, your majesty!

I have a few questions! [Because of COURSE she does.]

[ragnarsson]

[See, something in him just knew this was going to happen. He's been around Alice long enough to know her all too well.]

I am glad you enjoyed it, Alice. What kind of questions are they?

[madcuriosity]

Can all the gods change shapes or just Loki? Svaðilfari didn't get in trouble like the builder did, did he? Who are Loki and Thor? Do you think they're here? Who is Freyja, why were the gods perfectly alright with giving him the sun and moon?

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[momsboy]

Good story. I've heard it before, it's also famous in my world. [ Or infamous, rather. ]

When Loki was here I asked him about it, how could I not? But Loki being Loki, didn't confirm or deny anything.

[ragnarsson]

Did I tell it well?

[The mention of Loki gets a snicker out of Ivar.]

Of course he would. Did you really expect a straight answer out of a trickster god?

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[secondplacescrow]

Is that where horses they got here come from? The one with the many legs?

[ragnarsson]

I think so. I have no proof, of course, but where else would all the eight-legged steeds have come from?

Text: UN - GallowsCallibrator

[mindseer]

TH4T M4Y B3 0N3 0F TH3 M0R3 D1STURB1NG W4YS T0 G3T 0UT 0F 4 P4YM3NT 1V3 3V3R H34RD 0F
BUT TH1S L0K1 G0BBL3 B34ST 1SNT H3R3 1S H3?

TH3 C4V1NG 1N G14NT TH1NK P4NS P4RT 1S C00L TH0UGH

(OOC: Sorry for lateness. Long weekend.)

No worries!

[ragnarsson]

L00k, N0rs3 st0ries are full of all s0rts of w31rd sh1t l1ke that. 1t helps l1ven th1ngs up back h0me whenever there’s a sl0w night around the fir3. Nah, 1 haven’t s33n him around here. M1ght n0t have been b0rn yet or something?

1’ve got all s0rts of tales wh3re that happens. Maybe 1’ll d0 0ne next t1me!

[machinamentum]

Brah?! Seriously, that's why?

DUDE. I totally have to shit talk to Odin now about using his grandson for pony rides!

[ that's it, that is her take away from all of this. ]

[ragnarsson]

[Ivar tries to say something, but before he can even start he just starts laughing. He tries to stop, but every time he does, another fit of cackling comes over him. This will be going on for a while. There's a reason he knew he liked Gaige.]

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[darksoulwithlight]

...I think you need to step away from dobbin before you get any ideas there, pal.

[ragnarsson]

[That gets a slow blink out of Ivar.] ......Surely you aren’t suggesting what I think you’re suggesting.